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Three SCOTTISH Kick Rule'

johnakay

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Three SCOTTISH Kick Rule'

A Glasgow lawyer went duck hunting in rural Aberdeenshire . He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer Peter replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial lawyers in Scotland and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in Mintlaw. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'

The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!

His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

Summoning every bit of his will and remaining strength the lawyer very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

(I love this part)

The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."
 
I think the Lawyer was out of order in encroaching upon the Farmers land without his permission in the first place. In taking the action that he did, the Farmer was able to mete out a strong degree of punishment to the Lawyer for his indiscretion and arrogance, but did so with the Lawyers permission. On the other hand I believe that the Lawyer should not have shot the duck in the first place as the duck was simply flying along minding its own business. Imho the Lawyer is the bad guy on two counts. I am thinking that the Farmer had an element of good in him and he was only protecting his property.
 
this one is for all of the post delivery man and weman.....
please forgive my poor english.

a elderly lady lost her bag with 200$ wellfare money.
she was quiet depressed and had no idea how she will get food ths month.
so she wrote a letter to god asking him to help and dropped the letter in the
mail box.
at the post office they decided to open the letter since god has no mail box.
feelling sory for the elder lady they all chipped in an got 195$ all together.
they sent the money to the lady feelling happy for the good did.
after a week they get another letter from the lady.
"thank you god for all you have done for me.
thank you for the 195$ that you sent me so i will not starve.
dont wory about the missing 5 $. i bet i knew who took it.
its those people at the mail service..."


a reminder, this is a juke.
 
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